The Future of My Past
by syllablesxbreaths
Summary: Her mother was a Garrison Guard and her father, a Military Police, Yuka had always been brought up as a future investment to the army. However, things took a turn for the worst when her parents disappeared the day Wall Maria was breached. Saved by Erwin, and trained by Levi, Yuka soon finds out the truth about her parents and herself that she never knew before.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One: The Past**

Ah. How long has it been? I've forgotten. The paper I had once used to keep count of the days had long been abandoned and disposed of – it is a natural reaction, I suppose. The anger, and disappointment that is. Once the numbers started reaching four digits, the hope you once harboured and held so closely to your heart decrease in proportion. There was nothing to reignite the spark even if I wanted to. After all, if you had gone through this long without so much as a sign for your expectations, what evidence was there to substantiate your anticipation?

_What do you have left to convince yourself of anything but the worst?_

... I'm rambling on to myself again, aren't I? It's happening more frequently now than it was before. Maybe I truly am going insane.

"Hey, you – yes, _you_ – do you want to hear a story?

Yes? Good. Let's see, where should I start? Maybe I should do it the traditional way. Here goes:

Once upon a time, humanity faced a tragedy they had never anticipated before – _Extinction_. Or, at least, the impending doom of extinction. A specie, so used to being the superior beings to others, so used to being the hunters rather than the contrary, faced their retribution after the decades of basking in comfort. Helpless they were as they watched their families, friends, even the strangers they past by during their daily routines get devoured by creatures that were much stronger and taller than they were – at least thrice in height and ranging up to fifteen meters.

_Titans._

Ironically, other than the evident difference in built, their appearance resembled just like humans. And humans, with the fear in their eyes and vulnerability were attacked – _hunted _– just like animals they have pursued prior to this. Yet animals remained unscathed during the process. Perhaps the world had been contaminated by the likes of humans, and some divine intervention was bestowed over Earth – attempting to clean its filth off the surface of itself.

Regardless, since that day, humanity lost its first battle out of the many to come."

"Tch. Why are you telling me what I've already been told?" Erik's voice cut through mine, sitting across the dining table in my house with his hand supporting his head. The face of a bored teenager was with the Garrison situated within the walls of Rose.

"Do they not teach the virtues of patience where you came from?" Throwing the bun I had at him, my palm rested upon the table before pushing myself up from the seat – putting out the fire before grabbing two teacups from the shelf.

"Nobody really knows when it happened now, but these walls were erected to protect the remaining number of us behind a facade of safety. And within these walls lived a family, whose name would ring a bell to many residences.

_Evalisse_.

They were a young family with both husband and wife serving for the military; Lilia Evalisse from Garrison and Zachary Evalisse from Military Police. An outstanding couple among their peers; Well-liked, responsible, kind and skilful. Which was why, with all of these factors in mind, no one really knew how what happened _happened_. But – _how long did you say it was again? Ah, yes_ – five years ago, during the attack on Wall Maria, they were charged with abandonment of duty which was punishable by death."

"They chickened out?" Sipping his tea, Erik's posture indicated interests with his body leaning forward on the table as I settled back down on my seat. A finger tracing around the rim of the cup.

"Well, no – Maybe. Nobody knows for sure.

They disappeared on that day, and no one has ever seen them since. Which was queer considering the low survival rate if they had disappeared off the walls – with the fact that their 3DMG would have ran out of gas at some point, and ground travelling without horses was out of question in the world out here... Or so I've been told.

But even after a thorough search of the area, they could not find any traces of their existence, any tracks or any corpses that were theirs. They could not find the law breakers and hence, they could not charge them for their crimes.

...

Which was why they resorted to capturing their child, aged thirteen at that time, a week after the damage was done. Initially, they had hoped that this would lure them to appear and retrieve the only child they have had, and their only family member left. That way, they could capture them and the guards could finish their mission at last, you see.

Unfortunate for them though, it never happened. They never came back for their child."

With a small huff, the smoke emitting from hot tea floated away with the flow of the wind, cooling the beverage before sips were taken to quench my thirst.

"What happened to the kiddo, then?" Erik enquired.

"... Say, Erik. You've only just been assigned here, right? Have you ever questioned why you are here?" A question for a question, and the side of my lip twitched into a cheeky grin at the boy opposite me.

"Tch, why are you asking this now for? An order is an order. As long as you're not a titan, I don't care." Crossing his arms across his chest in a defiant motion, his brows narrowed into a frown. His answer to my question was not one that held an element of surprise. In fact, it was normal – ask any of the Garrison guards and they would probably have said the same thing.

_Nobody questions the status quo anymore, not as long as they get to keep their lives._

Reaching out for the empty tea cups, I stood once again, approaching the sink as my eyes held gaze at the boarded window with few beams of light sneaking into the house from its cracks.

"I've never introduced myself, have I?" My voice was soft, memories of the past slowly flooding into my mind, and with a pivot at the heels of my foot I found myself staring into the confused eyes of Erik again.

"Nice to meet you, Erik. My name is Yuka." A sincere smile reached my eyes as I extended my hand out to the boy opposite me.

_"Yuka Evalisse."_

* * *

**Authur's Note:**

Hi there! Thank you for reading my story! I hope you like the introduction to it so far but I have a few things to inform you about.

I may upload drawings of my story on **deviantart** under this username. The first one up is the cover page and a scene from **chapter three.**

First and foremost:  
**SPOILER ALERT. Proceeding from here on, the story ****will**** have spoilers if you're not a reader of the manga. And I do mean, ****major spoilers****.  
But of course, I will warn you on the start of manga spoilers (if any) before you read the chapter.**

Okay, proceeding on.

**I have not written anything further than this.  
**Okay, see, I wrote this out of a surge of inspiration from the story as I just finished catching up with the manga, and I had this idea for days that I couldn't get it out of my mind. So I apologize if you're yearning to read more. Do leave reviews so I know how you feel though, and it may get my lazy ass into writing. It's not a threat, but merely because I can only feel the sense of urgency if I know there are people waiting.

**About Eren and the story plot in general:  
**I'm basing this entirely off memory and so some things may not be accurate with the manga but it is how this story would go. As for Eren, I know Yuka's family situation is similar to Eren's father and trust me, I've got a plot in mind as to why. I'm not ripping Eren off the story, don't worry.

**About Levi  
**Okay, this is really important. I know he's supposed to be shockingly old, and many speculated he's 34. **BUT **in this story, he's around **22**, okay? I know some might feel that this is ridiculous, but this is also a fanfiction and my imagination. So just... Let me be please. ._. If this offends you, then I'm sorry. But I'll not change this detail.

Alright, I think this is all for now. THANK YOU FOR READING, PLEASE REVIEW, ILY ALL.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: The Saviours**

_"RECRUIT EEEE-RIKKKK!"_

It happened within seconds – the loud declaration of my companion's name, fully furnished with his rank in the military, followed by the slamming of the door as it hit the wall of my house. 6 feet tall, his face distorted with a menacing grin – _Kenneth Aldridge._ Despite his vicious appearance, his usual tendencies to bully new recruits in the area and generally all unpleasant traits you could think of that a bully typically possesses, Kenneth is kind deep inside. The compassion that resided within the guy though, is usually hidden behind false pretence of nonchalance, his aloof behaviour as a protection from this cruel world.

In summary, I've once described him as a giant cuddly bear with an unfortunate appearance.

"Y–Ye–Yes Sir!" In a moment of haste, the chair was tipped over by Erik's sudden movement – his posture now at attention with a fist over his heart in salute.

"What good life you're having eh, Recruit Erik? Drinking tea and getting served by our prisoner while I was out on the street? You know that taking bribes from the imprisoned is an offense, don't you?" Kenneth taunted, his arm slung over Erik, trapping him in a head lock while the latter found beads of sweat forming on his forehead.

"I– I did not, Sir! Sir, I– I would n–never!" While the sight of a frantic Erik was amusing, qualifying perfectly as the highlight of my day (so far, at least), the giggle that I had been suppressing bursts out into a laughter.

"Ay, Kenneth. Stop teasing him. He's going to wet himself, you know." There were times I forgot that I was being held captive by the government for a crime I did not commit, times like these when I had people who were genuinely willing to befriend me despite the situation I had managed to find myself in. It felt almost normal – though normalcy had long erased itself from my books and from the world.

But life hadn't always been this easy to get by, and nothing has changed since my capture five years ago. The only view allowed within the compounds of my home was that of the streets outside, through the two-panel window by the side of my door – and even that was not something given willingly by the authorities – they had to allow this window to be unobstructed by wood panels so the guards outside of my home could monitor any dangerous activities I might be up to.

Besides, if they didn't allow at least a view into my house, their decision to keep me captive in my home would be useless. After all, if they didn't do this, my parents – if they are still alive – will not be able to check in on me, and they will not be able to capture them in the act.

Except as I've said, nothing has happened thus far.

"But seriously, Yuka." Kenneth's eyes shuffled to me, narrowing his eyes in concern, his gaze was stern. It wasn't difficult to sense that the conversation was about to take a turn for the worse – it wasn't the first time this has happened. The first, I would never forget. For the first time it happened, the order for my execution summoned, it was three years ago. Yet, for some reason, there were people who thought my life was worth salvaging.

_I wonder how they're doing._

"Yuka." Kenneth's voice broke my chain of thoughts, his hands slamming deafeningly against the wooden dining table as my body jolted, spine straightened, back to reality. "Y–Yes, Kenneth?" Was this how Erik felt when Kenneth came barging in? Probably. The stutter in my voice complemented the rate of my heart – pounding against my chest so quick and hard that it almost hurt. Even the two words took effort to spill with the tightening of my throat.

I didn't like this, I didn't like it at all. I didn't like not knowing how the world was like out there, nor being kept away from information about the future I may or may not have on a daily basis.

"There's an attack, like the last time." He started, his voice low and slow as he waited for me to catch on. His eyes lacing with an element of concern before continuing following the signal of my nod. "The gate of Trost has been breached, they are speculating that it's the same titan that did it five years ago. Troops have been sent out to evacuate the residences, and they are almost done. Some trainees have already arrived, and they should be resting around the area outside your house." His speech was took a pick of pace as his eyes darted to the window behind and at the arriving troops who were rapidly increasing in numbers – none of whom looked alive anymore despite their physical conditions

Even after surviving, they have lost way too many people and friends to feel alive. These expressions I have witnessed and decoded countless times, and it never gets easier to observe from the last.

"Why are you telling me this?" Hanging my head as I picked at the spot on my dress, my eyes did their best to avoid contact with the Corporal in front of me, the voice was dropped to a near whisper. Kenneth's sigh only served as an indication of his despair over my reaction, before footsteps of two soldiers echoed further and further away from me.

"You _know_ why I'm telling you this, Yuka. Do not act recklessly, you promised _them_." And with that, Kenneth slammed the door shut again with Erik trailing behind in confusion, returning to their posts on the other side of the wall, guarding and cutting me off from the world.

It was as if the denial of mine that took place just moments ago was a chore to uphold, energy seeped at a rapid rate from me before my body made contact with the wall, sliding down with my head in my hands. Tears pricked my eyes, and I felt alone once again. Alone and tired from the constant battles I was put through for the five years of my youth; while other children were allowed to retain what little innocence the world allowed, mine was robbed away from me.

Of course I knew what Kenneth was going on about. Two years after the failure of my in-house imprisonment, a ridiculous conjecture invented by some guards claimed that my parents were the titans involved in the attack of Wall Maria. Oddly enough, their efforts to eliminate me came without warning and they were almost impatient to perform the death sentence – though their actions screamed apprehension more than comprehension.

The words from Kenneth, though concise, delivered a few messages. One, the rumour of my parents' apparent betrayal will soon resurface. Two, to anticipate a trial for my execution again – if it would be granted before they perform the deed that was. Three, do _not_ attempt an escape with the use of trainees outside.

And lastly, do not disappoint _them_ with any thoughtless behaviours.

Ah, _them_. What a convenient time for disaster to strike just as they have left for their latest expedition too. Would Erwin and Levi be disappointed if I did give in to fate, if I stopped escaping from my imminent death?

... I guess.

After all, Erwin was the one who saved me from the hands of Death three years ago. He who convinced the jury of my value, and the research his team may be able to conduct. Or my life, as a snack to the titan should the situation call for a distraction. It sounded heartless at that time, to hear the latter, but his intentions became clear once my life was spared. He did all he could so I was able to survive, pardoned.

But yet now, I'm–

_CRAAAAAAAACK_

"Wha–" The sound of thunder was proceeded by that of an explosion. What was happening? The noise, what was it? A titan? Here? My legs scrambled towards the window, pounding my fist against the window that separated me and the world, hoping for a source of information. Anything to calm the anxiety that was building up.

"WHAT WAS THAT?!" I shouted just as Erik, with his the blood drained from his face, responded to my knocking. His hand merely raising in attempt to calm me down, mouthing the words that I couldn't hear but could decode with the reading of his lips.

_Titan smoke_.

...

"OY YUKA. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" The voices behind me continued their pursuit, but at this point, none of it matters anymore. If I were to be captured and executed, so be it. The burning curiosity, the slim chance that that my parents may be titans and that they were finally coming for me was worth the risk – or so I convinced myself. Running was always my forte anyway, from blame, from reality and the physical aspects of it.

They will not be able to catch up with me if I continued at this pac–

"_Oomph._" Hurts. It hurts. My head, I think I've hit my head. Who the hell was blocking my way?!

"Ah! I'm so sorry!" The male figure helped me up, his face decorated with freckles with an attempted smile through the chaos around us. "Are you okay? I don't think it's safe fo– Oh!" Too soon, two arms interlinked with my own before I was hauled up in the air, my legs attempting to resist, flailing and putting up one last fight before I found myself back into the house.

"ARE YOU INSANE?!" Kenneth bellowed, the heat rising to his cheeks as it tinged them in a shade of dark red – _anger_. "YOU WERE LUCKY IT WAS A TRAINEE YOU BUMPED INTO. WHAT IF IT WAS ONE OF THOSE GUARDS, HUH? WAS THAT WORTH IT? WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO ACHIEVE?" It was unclear if his erratic breaths came from the run, or from his rage – neither I was concerned about as I stayed where I landed; my back against the wall, head staring intensely at my hands which have suddenly piqued my interests and legs straightened on the ground.

I saw the shadow move, and the lights in the room shifted – Kenneth was pacing as his fingers ran through his hair. Erik's shadow remained rooted behind him.

"I wanted to see for myself. I wanted to see if they have finally come to get me. " I felt a drop of water sliding down the side of my cheek before staining my dress.

And that was when I realised how selfish I had been. If I did escape, I would not be the only one who had to face the punishment. Erik, and Kenneth will be investigated on their responsibilities in keep me _locked up._ They believed enough in me to leave the door unlock so I could escape in the face of life and death – they wanted to give me an escape route if the titans infiltrated these walls. Yet I took it for granted and put their lives on the line.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, legs standing unsteadily as I gently pushed the two guards out of the door, catching glimpse of the trainee from earlier as he stared back in confusion – his hand raised in a short wave of acknowledgement before I shut the door back again.

Sigh, I can already hear him at the back of my head even though he's not here. _"Oy brat, do not throw another person's life away because of your inability to use a brain."_

* * *

**_P.S: You know you've been writing on forums too much when you end up italicising with [i][/i] tags._**


	3. Chapter 2 BONUS

**Chapter Two BONUS: The Stranger**

**[The Stranger's POV]**

"Ah, Jean!" Watching the duo-toned hair teenager heading the direction of the Titan's steam was worrying, but the boy who was on the edge of insanity – Daz – required more attention than the former.

"TITAN. THERE'S NO ESCAPE. NONE. WE'RE GOING TO DI–"

"DAZ! Breathe! We're not going to die, we made it out alive, didn't we? You're still here. We are all here, we will fight it together if it is a titan." With a hand to his shoulder, I gave a light squeeze, watching as his breaths slowed back to normal before passing on the responsibility to Connie and Sasha.

Gazing over at the smoke that continued to rise, my feet subconsciously followed in direction of it, eye peeled for any emergencies that required action. "What exactly happened?" Mumbling my thoughts as chaos continued in the town behind Wall Rose, my mind drifted to the different scenarios that might be true.

Could it be the armoured titan? Was it able to appear and vanish at will like the Colossal Titan? If so, what was its motive in–

"Ah! I'm so sorry!" The apology was instinctive with the impact of my back, which in effect caused my feet to step forward before spinning around to the girl on the ground.

_... Pretty._

It was the first thought during my time of shock before snapping back to reality, helping her get up only to have two Garrison guards take her away – back to the direction she came from.

"H–Hey, she's a lady." I called out in vain, footsteps quickening to a jog behind the trio before stopping short opposite the house. The house I had been sitting outside with Daz. "Hey..." My voice trailed off into a soft whisper as I watched the scene unfold in front of me. Troops? Who was she? And what would happen if she did get discovered out of the house?

The confusion must had been written on my every expression, for when the door shut opposite me, my hand was still in the air – retreated the second the bulkier of the duo guards glared.

"Her name is Yuka." The voice of a little boy sounded beside as his tiny hand tugged at my jacket. "Mummy says she's not allowed out of the house or we won't see her ever again." He couldn't have been older than 5 years old, his other arm clutching a board close to his chest. "Sometimes she leaves the town with a guy, and I never know if it will be the last time I see her. But she always makes it back, with the same guy, so I don't think he is one of the bad guys." He continued his explanation, with me now crouching beside him.

"My name is Danny." The wonders of being a kid was how easily they could forget their sadness, despite the cruel world they were born in. My mouth opened to introduce myself, but the opportunity was cut off when Danny shoved the board he had in my hands in haste, along with a white chalk.

"My mummy is coming, I have to go back into the house. You can talk to Yuka with this, it's how we became friends." A toothy grin decorated his chubby face before he waddled into the house again, turning around just to say, "But remember to look out for the bad guys!"

... I didn't... Even get to butt in a word.

Staring down at the board, and up at the house in front, the chalk in my hand was rolled around on my palm as I contemplated. Bad guys? How was I supposed to differentiate them? He couldn't mean titans, could he?

"Ay, Freckles! Do it if you want to, it's safe." Leaning up against the door of the house was the scrawnier, younger boy from before, his head jerking towards the window before tapping it to gain the girl's attention.

Yuka... Was it?

_'Hello, Ms. Yuka. Are you hurt? I'm so sorry, again.' _Her astonished expression came in cue with the scoff of the guard in front of her door – effecting in the reddening of my cheeks before I hurriedly erased all evidence.

_'Hi. I'm alright, it was my fault anyway. I'm sorry.'_ The chalkboard on her end flashed the quick answer before she pointed to the house Danny lived in. _'Did he give you this?' _Tilting her head, a small smile decorated her face before she brought down her board, and after I gave a quick nod.

_'What's your name?'_ She replied again, checking out her surroundings as the crowd began to shuffle.

**"ALL SQUADS ASSEMBLE."**

The sudden announcement caused an influx of movement, blocking the visual communication between her and I.

_Ah, I can't afford to delay any longer._

Scribbling my last message, I left the board standing against the pillar of the house before following the movement of the crowd.

_'Marco Bott.'_


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three: Levi**

–**Year 848 –**

_"Get up."_

_His voice was cold and emotionless, towering over me as I laid on the earth beneath, my elbows and palms stung with cuts. It was no use; The two years of gap from using the 3DMG had seemingly crippled my previously acquired ability to manoeuvre with the gear that was strapped around my hip. I have tried over a dozen times now and have yet been able to keep myself from falling to the ground._

_"Have your failures impaired your hearing? Up, I said. I've never given you the permission to take a break." Harshness continued to tinge Levi's every word, lingering in the air as tension thickened. "When Erwin said you've used the equipment since the age of seven, I've never expected your performance to be this pathetic." He scoffed._

_And in reaction, the fist in my hand tightened and my knuckles whitened. "What's the use of this? Going out of your way, putting me up in disguise just to swing around the forest like it would make a difference?!" Through gritted teeth the defence mechanism kicked in as I retaliated, my body springing up from the spot as my head tilted slightly to meet his eyes._

_But deep inside, I knew he was right. Since a young age, I've played around with the equipment out of a child's curiosity, as though it was my version of a playground. As a kid, my unauthorised use of the gear was clearly overlooked by the higher ups, and with the relationships my parents had with their comrades – I was given a version of it at the age of ten. It was a birthday gift, and an investment in exchange with the hopes that I would continue their legacy when I'm of age. The blades were replaced with those made of wood and I was 'trained'. Of course, that was just for leisure, like a favourite pastime._

_At that time it was my imaginary battleground and everything was just a sort of game to me, and so was it to others. That was until the year after. Suddenly, everything changed. The atmosphere when we had our 'training' sessions turned into a serious affair, and instead of being able to swing around in the training grounds of the military, we were hidden behind trees in a nearby village._

_I never understood why, and I was never allowed to probe or tell anyone. It began with the perfecting on usage of gear, to basic use of blades, and finally, hand-to-hand combat._

_Now, everything I did through the strenuous trainings for the years before their disappearance was gone with my parents._

_"I am not going to be your babysitter." Levi's voice broke my thoughts, expression remained dead-panned as he stated in a tone of disapproval. "Tch. Erwin should have done this himself if he was so bent on being charitable."_

_Self control left me with the shove against the dark-haired boy, my eyes wide and my lips quivered as I attempt to keep a lid on the rising anger in me. Trying, and failing. "Go then! Like they did! I never asked for your help, nor Erwin's. I never said I wanted to be saved!" My breath grew erratic with every syllable spouted, tears now stained my cheeks uncontrollably from fury._

_"THEY SHOULD HAVE JUST EXECUTED ME. IT WASN'T LIKE IT WOULD HAVE MEANT ANYTHING TO ANYONE, ESPECIALLY NOT TO MY PARENTS ANYWAY!"_

_The only sound left apart from my collapse to the ground – my palms flat against it as my body bent over in exhaustion – was the sound of ruffling leaves, effected by the wind and on the trees that surrounded us. Soon, it was accompanied by whimpers that left my lips, growing increasingly louder and irrepressible as the facade of indifference broke down in the presence of Levi._

_The one person I hated to have witnessing this._

_"I despise people who do not see value in their own lives. If only lives could be exchanged, yours would be better off sacrificed for the people who died beyond the walls." He was disgusted, that much I could infer from his words, following the blade that fell beside me. "If you want to be executed so badly, then go ahead. I'm giving you the chance." The shadow of his figure shortened with the bending of his knees, now crouching beside me with a look of disdain – against my bewildered expression. "Do it and you would do them a favour – do those people who wanted you dead, and those who accused your parents. Do it and your action will mean agreement to the rumours they had been inventing."_

_"Do it, and escape from the fight. Be the coward that you have always been."_

_A... Coward._

_Was that really what I was? No... I wasn't. I fought, I told them that my parents were innocent – there were possibilities they might have been captured, or eaten. I denied all accusations from the beginning... Or was it only __at__ the beginning? Have I really lost faith, lost sight on who were the real enemies? They were not my parents... No... The enemies were the people who have been attempting to make my parents the scapegoats._

_"You've done it, haven't you? Attempt to seek the easy way out of your mess?" My eyes snapped up to meet his, widened at his knowledge of me fading scars behind the sleeve. "What's stopping you then? You were so bent on it earlier, weren't you? Do it. It's your only chance left."_

_A wave of remorse and guilt hit me in the chest as my right hand touched the spot on my left wrist, my mouth opening and closing as words failed to form. The shaking of my head was slow, but certain._

_If they wanted me dead, I will make sure to put up one hell of fight and strike chaos in their attempts to do so. I will not give in to the bastards who turned my life into hell._

_"No? That's too bad." Standing back up from his spot, Levi looked down at me. Arrogant jerk. "Now get back to your training. You are not allowed to depend on me when things turn ugly."_

_Pushing myself off the ground once more, standing a few centimetres short from Levi, I dusted the remains of dirt from my clothing and my hands, I feel the motivation and determination surging in me which was undeniably triggered by our unfortunate interaction. My eyes narrowed as I observed my surroundings, operating device clutched readily in my hands._

_"I will not." And those were my last words that day, before my first successful take off after the two years of imprisonment hiatus. _

_I will not allow myself to rely on him._

* * *

–** Back to Present Day –**

So why is it that I am recalling this memory now, desperately trying to take back my words?

Perhaps it was the looming shadow over me, covering the light of the sun with its figure – always smiling, like a nightmare that wouldn't end. It must had been a six feet, his fingers grabbing onto the roof of the building, climbing towards Armin from behind me before noting my appearance.

"YUKA! Behind you!" The blonde called out to me, stopping in his tracks which went alongside the Aberrant as the duo attempt to complete a mission I didn't understand nor was informed about. I wasn't meant to make it out of this battlefield alive, not if it went according to _their _plans anyway.

I was paralyzed. My first encounter with a titan, and this is how I'm going to die? They looked much different from drawings – a lot bigger, very much creepier.

* * *

**_(Two Hours Before)_**

_"S–Sir, with all due respect, Commander Erwin specifically sa–" Erik was visibly shaking in the presence of three men from the Military Police. I recognized them though I could not assign a name to each of their face. One was a ginger head, his face equipped with a constant scowl with sunken cheeks. Another was stouty, dark-haired and looked like he could shred Erik in pieces if he claimed another word of defiance. The last was quiet – an observer – as his dark brown hair was swipe back, and his skinny form leaning sideway against the wall of the house. The latter being more than likely the one with actual skills and leadership among the trio._

_"Well, Commander Erwin isn't here now, is he?!" The stout stepped towards Erik dangerously, his fists clutching each side of Erik's collar, lifting him a distance away from ground._

_"B–but Captain Lev–" His words were replaced with a strangled cry, his body being flung to the sides of the empty street, arms winding themselves around his torso._

_"Now, Ms Evalisse. You can follow us and do as you're commanded, or you can watch us torment him till you do. Either way, you have no choice." The observer whispered, his breath against my ear caused a shudder before chuckling humourlessly. "Shall we go then?"_

* * *

_"Moron, what are you doing?! Are you this eager to be eaten by one of the titans?!"_

For a fleeting moment, I thought Levi has returned, only to realise it was all in my head when the giant hand came slamming down from above me, and me fleeing just in time.

"RUN, ARMIN!" I urged, for it was the only order issued for my presence. "I WILL COVER YOU."

_"Protect Armin!" _Commander Pixis had said, shortly after the introductions of the people involved in the mission. It was hardly believable that Dot Pixis would succumb to any threats, or unreasonable requests by the Military Police, yet not at all given his eccentricity. The agreement for my participation in this apparent reclaiming of Wall Rose, or the thought of reclaiming the town in itself was an example of his absurdity. But, given past interactions in my childhood with the man, part of me still trusted his judgement without a doubt.

_Attack_ – I reminded myself, with an image of Levi's movements replaying like a broken record in my head. The hook of my gear attached itself to the titan's neck, blades held in a reverse grip and with a spiral, sliced the chunk off my enemy.

One titan down, countless to go. My eyes refocused itself on Armin's surroundings, landing on the Aberrant with a boulder on its shoulders – the key of the mission as I've gathered. By the sound of Armin's persuasion to the unconscious titan earlier, its name was Eren, but that wasn't all.

He spoke to it like he knew the titan before this. But it's impossible, isn't it? Titans couldn't talk, nor understand us, right?

"ARMIN! MIKASA!" Increasing in speed, my feet soon left the tiles of the roof as I leapt into the air, attaching the hook on the opposite building gaining distance while my comrades dropped to the grounds below.

But it wasn't long before I was trapped. Three titans to my right, and two to my left – all salivating over my existence like I was a feast to their eyes, quite literally. The loud crash of the boulder and green smoke had only given me a small window to swing myself out of the way from an incoming hand. Increasing the gap between myself and the three titans, I attached the hook to the ten metre class titan on my left, spiralling into an attack, before doing the same for the six metre.

...

"Oy, brat. Who gave you permission to imitate my moves?"

... T–That voice. No, not just that. The titans, they're motionless, faced down, and those remaining in the town are falling in rapid rates as well – much different than how it was like just seconds ago.

"Levi..." And here comes the moment I would surely regret in days to come. Dull blades were discarded on the ground, legs sprinted towards the dark-haired captain before arms flung without self control around the neck of Levi. **"I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE."** Yup, _this_ moment. The moment I bawled my eyes out on the shoulder of Levi like a child, out on the roof top of a titan-filled town.

"... Why are you crying, moron? Tch. Now you're getting all that filthy blood on me." Yet despite this, his hand ruffled my hair before giving a few gentle pats on my head. "Come on, let's get you back before you pee yourself."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

I may upload drawings of my story on **deviantart** under this username. The first one up is the cover page and a scene from this chapter.

Hey guys! I need some feedbacks on this story, if you've made it this far.

I'd like to know if my writing style for this is too heavy to read, or what you think can be better for you? It doesn't have to be a review if you're not comfortable, feel free to drop me a private message instead.

Give me all your constructive criticism, I will not be offended, I just want to know my areas of improvement or areas I should continue doing. Thank you, your feedbacks will be really useful!


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four: The Communicator**

It must have been hours since the end of my supposed mission, hours since I stumbled back home with a foreign guard by me, in my uniform and greeted by an anxious Erik outside my door. A simple wave of my hand indicated my exhaustion from the task and lacking interests in continuing a conversation, and the jacket was clumsily tossed to the other side of the room. My body flung itself welcomingly on the bed, sprawled across it and falling into a deep slumber within seconds.

"And you think this reinforces our speculation?" A voice spoke coolly from my right.

Dancing on the thin line of sleep and awareness, fully clad in uniform (apart from the titan-blood-smeared jacket), my eyes rolled around behind closed lids – as though it will be able to see through my flesh and identify the figures in my house by doing so. "Yes. I think it _confirms_ our speculations more than anything. After five years – three from their apparent discovery – and this is the perfect opportunity; a window with us gone and a titan attack." Another piped in, deeper and more mature in his speech. Both of which I could recognise vaguely, though the former better than the latter.

"Ah... If that's the case, it will be good if we can question her before our time is up, but she looks so peaceful sleeping." The third voice was higher in pitch, her tone significantly more cheerful than her companions followed by an immediate discomfort of sudden presence looming in front of my face, of which I fought not to flinch in surprise. The topic of conversation had stirred my interests and my ears strained to catch each word carefully, though it had seemed like I have missed the most important aspects of the discussion. It was undoubtedly about me, and about the military's sudden decision to send me out in the fields – especially when no one other than the Scouting Legion knew about my secret training for the past three years.

Which meant the people in my room were–

"You mean she looks peaceful _pretending_ to sleep." As if in confirmation to my thoughts, the first voice called out my lie but I was determined not to give my cover away – so I fake-snored softly (I know, _real smooth_). Boosting that, I shifted slightly in my position in hopes that it would give it a realistic edge to my act. "Tch. Seriously." The voice grew irritated before sounds of step echoed louder beside me. The presence that was once in front of my face was replaced to a sinking of the bed, at the spot just beside me. It took me by surprise, my eyes shooting open as arms thrashed around comically, attempting to hit wherever I can as Levi squashed both sides of my face with unbeatable strength that I thought my jaws would surely give way if it lasted any longer.

"L–Levi! You can't manhandle a lady like that!" The stranger worked to pry Levi's fingers away from my face, looking frantic as she continued shooting apologetic glances towards me. "Levi! Let – Her – Go!" And finally, Levi did, a glint of satisfaction in his eyes as he eyed me of which I glared back in retaliation. "Idiot." He muttered, before knocking at the back of my head while I was bent over at my waist, with legs stretched out on the bed, my palms rubbing circles on my reddened cheeks. The action gained another stern call of his name by the lady in spectacles before he was shunned away from the bed.

"Ah, are you okay? So sorry he's such a violent git. I'm Hange! Hange Zoë, and I've heard a great deal about you!" With every word, her grin grew wider, her face inched closer and in effect causing me to maintain our distance by leaning away further. The spectacles that framed and magnified her eyes reflected the orangey light rays that were beaming in streaks through the boarded window, indicating the setting of the sun.

"H–Hi? I–It's nice to meet you– _Oh!_" Barely finished with my sentence, my hand was seized by both on Hange whose eyes looked like a child on Christmas Day, filled with all the presents she had ever wanted. For a moment, tears seemed to coat her brown orbs, seemingly touched by the experience of speaking to a stranger like me for the first time.

"I've always wanted to meet you, but I was never allowed to. You're as pretty as Levi said you are–"

"I have never said that."

"–Ah yes, just as he described indeed–"

"Stop inventing nons–"

"–He always acts so cool on the outside but really– Ah! I wasn't done talking to her yet!" It was the last sentence from Hange before she, too, was manhandled out of the way by Levi. While the two settled their differences (mostly Hange talking and Levi pretending he didn't register her existence), Erwin, who had been silent and observing in the background, stepped forward and took the seat that was previously occupied by his companions. "Long time no see, Yuka." He smiled gently, almost fatherly if not for his younger appearance. Unlike Levi, who had always been the one escorting me on our trainings, disguised as a fortnightly interrogation to the authorities, I see Erwin on an almost annual basis. "We can't stay for long because we have to go seek permission to talk to Eren Yeager but–"

"Eren? The titan? So that titan really did understand human language?" Instinctively, my head leaned heavily to my left as my brows furrowed in confusion at the new information. But even more at the reactions of my visitors. Levi's face, deadpanned at first, now had his brows raised high in a combination of surprise and amusement, while pure shock took over Erwin and Hange's. A surge of need to explain myself increased the defensiveness in my tone the next time I opened my mouth again, hands moving frantically along with them as I began to describe what I saw Armin doing to Titan Eren out during the mission earlier.

There was silence, _deafening_ silence, when I was done. Knowing looks were exchanged between the trio, leaving me solely out of loop. "... Yuka. How much did they tell you before you were sent out into the town?" Sensing the seriousness in Erwin's voice, coupled with the fury that flashed across his eyes for the mere seconds that his question took, my back straightened unnaturally. The lump in my throat was forcefully swallowed down before I managed to find my voice again.

"Uh, nothing. Not from the military guards that came anyway– _no, Levi, Erik did try to stop them_." Catching the twist in Levi's posture from behind Erwin, I shot him a warning look. Poor Erik had quite the beating because of me as it is, he won't suffer another from Levi. "Anyway, I got a general idea from the other people. The titan was supposed to seal the hole in Trost and I was assigned to guard Armin Arlert. He was talking to the Aberrant – _Eren_ – while I ensured his safety." By now, I can already sense that I have missed out a crucial information from another round of looks exchanged. But with all that was at stake – including the fact that I may have been regarded as having lost my mind – a silent mouthing of the word _'what?'_ was all I managed.

"Say, Yuka." Levi started again, approaching me while Erwin gave up his spot for him. My hands shielding my cheeks in response when his figure settled for the spot you occupied just minutes ago. "...Moron, put your hands down. This is serious." Despite his words, a look of bemusement lingered in his expression at my reaction, his hand raising slightly, hovering over my head before Hange warned him against the abusive action. Tangling my hands together with my fingers interlaced on my lap, my thumbs danced around each other in uneasiness. "Didn't you tell me you were from Shiganshina?" Levi spoke again, his eyes boring into mine.

"Yea, but my family moved when I was two, so I can't tell you much about the place." Perplexed at the sudden question of my history – more so at the fact that Levi remembered the tiny fact that was mentioned during early days of my training – I looked from one soldier to another, attempting to decode any hints that I may find. "I feel like I'm missing something." I stated plainly, mildly irritated by the lack of frankness in the room at the moment.

A scoff escaped the guy in front of me, his hand tugged at my left cheek (which was still numb from his earlier attack), "This. Won't. Be. Your. First." With every syllable, he tugged harder, his face remained emotionless but I know, _I know_, at the back of his mind, he was enjoying this torture way too much. It wasn't until my hand smacked his away with a scowl that he finally stopped..

"Well, sorry if this might be too much to ask from you, Yuka." Hange interrupted her face unapologetic, contrasting much with her choice of words. "But can you injure yourself?" It took a few seconds for the words to digest in my head, rerunning it in my head for several times while I blinked blankly at her before a bewildered _"What?!"_ escaped my lips. Part of my gave her the benefit of doubt, that she truly meant her request for greater things, but another scowled in disgust at the cruel joke made at my expense. That part of my history was never one that I was proud of, and a mistake I swore never to commit again.

Sensing the darkening of my eyes and change in demeanour, Levi cut the line of vision between me and Hange by shifting into my view again. "Self injury is a sensitive topic," Levi explained unhelpfully at the lady before turning back to me with a small knife in hand. "But do it – It's not a jab at your past, but an experiment that is bigger than us." Cutting short the start of my protest against his words was a harsh "_Now_."

With that, the trio gathered at the far corner of the room, ignoring my exasperated pleas. I rolled the knife around in the palm my hand, occasionally stealing glances through my eyelashes in uneasiness before finally taking a deep breath when I figured there's no way out of this.

_Okay, Yuka, let's get this over with. _I told myself, shrugging my shoulders and stretching my neck from side to side before my body slackened again. _On the count of three._ A deep intake of breath again. _One... Two... Three!_

... ... ...

**"OWWWWW!"** The knife clanged dully on the wooden floor beside as blood streamed steadily and uncontrollably down my arm; My hand had instinctively thrown the weapon away from my injury at the shock of the pain. The fresh gash right below my elbow is stinging, reminding with every surge of pain about the idiocy of the situation. "... You truly are one of a kind. I can never find someone as dumb as you." Clicking his tongue loudly, Levi hastily grabbed a fresh cloth and bandages from the bathroom, emerging again as he wrapped it around my wound expertly.

"You were the one who encouraged this!" I retorted defiantly, hissing at the pressure that was now applied on my arm. "No one told you to cut it this deep!" Levi snarled back in return, before twisting his body around at the duo who was watching us incredulously. "She's not a titan shifter then?"

"Titan shifter?" I parroted, seeking answers from Hange when Erwin refused me of one. "Maybe we should bring her along with us." She said.

* * *

"Ohhhh! What is that?"

The sunset flooded the town into an orange-red tinge, children skipping around the streets while parents, though in high spirits at humanity's first successful retaliation, still casted watchful glances at the incoming carriage that we were in. The earlier mission had clearly changed the atmosphere of these streets as people buzzed and busied themselves more than usual. My eyes ogled at the surroundings of our travelling carriage, viewing the part of town I was locked away from since five years ago, pointing at strange objects of fascination and waving at strangers along the roads.

"Stop looking like a tourist and sit still." Levi was right beside me with his party pooping tendencies as though he was allergic to happiness, while Hange sat opposite me with Erwin beside her.

"But this is the first time I've been out to town in years. I can hardly remember anything about this place anymore. Ah, that's old man Howard, isn't he? He used to give me sweets all the time when I was little!" My glee was unstoppable even by Levi, who had given up on calming my excitement after a while. Hange, on the other hand, fuelled it on with her curiosity. Pointing to the various people whose faces I recognised from their occasional passing of my window, I introduced without their consent, bouncing in my seat in excitement every time a familiar face or place came round.

"Ah, Levi! That's the tea shop I got your birthday present from last year! Or well, Erik did on my behalf, and I guess it really wasn't my money since they gave it to Erik at the mention of my name... But well, anyway! My mom used to only buy the tea leaves from them, so it's the only place I really know about..." Trailing off at my own ramble and recollection of my childhood, it had seemed effective in deflating the endless enthusiasm I had been exhibiting thus far. The happy memories had served to be more painful than the searing pain on my arm.

"I remember." As if in attempt to distract me from my thoughts, Levi replied – entertaining my ramblings for the first time since our journey away from my house – gazing over my slouching form at over to the window on my side. "They had nice tea leaves."

* * *

**(A Day Later)**

"AH! IS THIS TRUE?" Hange's voice boomed just as the door to the dining area flung open with great force. Sitting around the wooden dining table was Erwin and Levi, each with a tea cup in front of them, and mine, empty, in my hands as I rose from the table seconds before her intrusion. "We will be getting Yuka into Survey Corps?!" Within a short amount of time, she crossed the room. I felt my shoulders being held in a tight drip, Hange looking at me with great interests and her cheeks tinged red in exhilaration.

"We have a hearing two days before Eren's. We will see then." Erwin replied coolly from his seat, his eyes observing me as if he is trying to analyse and calculate the risks this will entail. Eren, from the information provided to me by Erwin and Levi, had been from my village in Shiganshina, though the possibilities of us knowing each other was next to zero, seeing as my family moved out of the town a year before he was born. That said, the uncanny coincidence of our parents' disappearances had left a series of questions to be answered – of which they had thought suitable for us to establish communication. The similarity in our background was also the cause of their recently requested self-injury. Apparently that was the method Eren used to transform into the titan. "But with her performance outside the walls, and the thin relations we can draw between both their parents' disappearances, I am sure we will if we play our cards right." Erwin continued with his tone filling thickly with confidence, before rising to his feet as well, giving a few encouraging pats on my shoulders before exiting the room.

"That will be great! You can experiment on Sonny and Bean with me–" Hange started, her hands clasped tightly in front of her, head leaning forward from her inability to contain her emotions, leaving me the job to distance our bodies again.

"Do not drag her into your freak experiments." Levi stood abruptly, eyeing Hange disdainfully as he strode to the spot beside me, collect both he and Erwin's cups before conveniently placing them in my hands.

"–It will be so fun! They are really friendly–"

A hand wrapped protectively over my shoulders as my eyes grew wider in incomprehension at Hange's behaviour while talking about the titans. An oversized creature having humans as a tea break snack was hardly the definition of friendly in my books.

"–Oh! I know, why don't you go visit them now? With me!" She leaned forward till her face were mere centimetres away from mine again, catching me in surprise and I could only gape uselessly at her sudden suggestion. The hand around me now pulled me back as Levi's back came into view, wedging himself between Hange and I.

"I don't think your interpretation of 'friendly' is in line with the sane, Hange." The dark-haired figure stopped Hange's hand that was approaching me from his side, in obvious attempt to tug at my wrist and drag me to wherever it was. Her face slackened, glancing across Levi's shoulders and at me with droopy eyes that resembled a sad puppy.

"I– I guess, we can? I mean, there's not much to do anyway, right?" The disappointment in her eyes guilt tripped me with every glance. Before I registered my actions, the words had left my lips as I timidly peeped over Levi's shoulder, cowering just a little at his death glare, of which he saved for occasions where I exhibit, and I quote, 'true stupidity'.

Hange was bursting with excitement in every step, walking at a faster rate than usual as I struggled to catch up with both her ramblings and her pace. While she had strode hastily, I was on a verge of a light run alongside her. It was a wonder how Levi could keep up with her so easily, or the fact that he was here in the first place. "I don't want her to be eaten this soon," He had defended his actions. "If anything, her getting eaten when we're beyond the walls can at least cause a distraction for the rest of us to run." He continued, nonchalance in his expression and tone while I childishly stuck my tongue at him from behind his back.

But soon, instead of being alongside Hange and deliberately ignoring Levi's silent company, I reduced to hiding behind Levi at the sight of two titans even though they are firmly planted to the ground beneath, restricted in their movements. There was something about how perpetually happy they looked, void of all remorse at the devouring of humans, that bothered me a great deal. "I thought you wanted to see them." Levi mocked, though he allowed my continued shelter behind his back, constantly peeping from across his shoulder and my hands tightly clutched to his arm.

"They are creepy looking." I answered plainly, while watching Hange attempt to establish communication with a series of questions.

"Yuka? Yuka! What are you doing there? Ah, Levi, is this the first time you can have someone hide behind your... ba– Never mind" Stopping hastily at her joke with the murderous stare Levi had given her, I stifled a chuckled which was gone in an instant at the grabbing of my wrist by Hange, tugging me forcefully towards the titans. Placing me a little too close to the creatures for my comfort.

"You try it, Yuka! Maybe they prefer someone younger, and better looking!" She urged cheerfully, applying pressure on my shoulders and pushing me nearer to the titans. My attempts in resisting were futile against her persistence. "O–Okay. Hi?" I greeted hesitantly, the titans looked at me with curiosity but none attempted any form of action. A nudge from Hange told me to continue the one-sided conversation (almost like talking to Levi at times). "But, why does it matter? You said it had never succeeded right?" I turned to Hange in exasperation, before discreetly distancing myself from the titans.

"Ah, don't worry! They're our friends! Let's try asking the same questions! Right. Moblit! Take this experiment down!" Standing at the sidelines was a brown haired boy, who only sighed in defeat before nodding his head, paper and quill ready in his hands.

"Okay. Are you hurting anywhere?" Hange started slowly, stepping a few steps ahead of me despite the protest of her comrades – no response. The titans merely stared on at their human treats scattered around the perimeters. "Yuka, your turn."

Startled by the cue, I cleared my voice, shooting a nervous glance at Levi – hoping to seek his assistance to wiggle out of it (and failing). "U–Uh. Are... Are you hurting anywhere?" That was when a weird coincidence happened, both titans – Sonny and Bean – made a groaning sound, while their heads shook shortly from side to side.

"Wha... What? Was that a... reaction?" By now, everyone had focused their wide-eyed gaze on me, and I inched closer to Levi for comfort, baffled by the results myself. "No no, don't be scared. Maybe it was just a coincidence." Though Hange didn't seem like she was very willing to be convinced by her own words. "Okay, let's try this again. Are you hungry?" Directing back to the titans again, they stilled once more at her – mute. "Yuka?"

The intense stares from around us is starting to get to me as my palms become wet, fingers tugged at my pants before looking at Levi for an indication of what to do – of which he merely jerked his head at the titans. Taking a deep breath, I looked to the pair again.

"A–Are you h– hungry?" The stutters in my speech are attributed to a few reasons – one, the fear of a reaction again and two, the fear that I will be locked up again if that were to happen, bound to experiments by Hange. The latter sent a chill down my spine at the thought of being chained up like the two titans in front of me. But as luck would have it, to my astonishment and dismay, the titans shook their heads once more, a look of comprehension seemingly flitting in their eyes as I spoke.

"Where were you captured?" Without warning, Hange spoke again with predictable silence as response. Levi now has his arms crossed around his chest, observing the situation with deepened creases between his eyes. My fingers dug deep into the palm of my hands from the clenching of my first, attempting to calm my erratically beating heart as it pounded in my ears.

"Wh... Where were you captured?" My voice now reduced to a near mumble, afraid of the results and afraid of what it may mean to everyone else if a final response was given. So much so that when only silence filled the premises, I let out a quiet sigh of relief, only for it to be robbed away by a single word from a foreign voice which sounded much like a series of short grunts.

"~T~r...os~t."

* * *

**Author's Note:**  
Just wanted to say a quick thank you for your reviews, follows and favourite! It really means a lot to me.  
I have also yet to read through this for mistakes because I'm a terrible person.  
And for those who may be wondering about Yuka's Battle Statisics, here goes:

**Yuka Evalisse's Statistics  
Battle Skill:** 10/10  
**Initiative:** 8/10  
**Strategy:** 7/10  
**Teamwork:** 8/10  
**Fear:** 6/10  
**Empathy:** 10/10


End file.
